Showing posts with label symptoms. Show all posts

Is anyone else hungry?

DISCLAIMER: This post contains information about our pregnancy. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. I understand how much these posts can sting and promise to continue to add the disclaimer on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. I understand.

Hello everyone!  I hope all is well!  I thought I'd take a couple of moments to discuss how HUNGRY I am.  I'm sorry ya'll.  I'm trying not to be, but for the life of me, I am famished this AM.  I woke up and left the house at 8:40 to take my son to a medical appointment in prep for his upcoming sixth grade year.  Before I left I had yogurt and my multi-vitamin, just to take the edge of of any some coming hunger and to give the baby some energy.  We went to the doctor, finished the appointment, and I dropped him at school.  On the way to the office, I stopped at the local Wawa and ordered a cheese quesadilla (cut into three pretty large wedges) and a small strawberry smoothie.  I devoured them when I made it to the office fifteen minutes away.

Immediately after eating, I am filled with a huge desire for something else to eat.  I'm hungy!!  Now the problem is, I have already eaten a healthyish meal.  I should be good for a while.  I am NOT.  I am HUNGRY!  Why am I hungry?!

Seriously, I could eat a house right now.  Am I the only one this is happening to?  Help!

-K

10 week update

DISCLAIMER: This post contains information about our pregnancy. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. I understand how much these posts can sting and promise to continue to add the disclaimer on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. I understand.

10 week Recap: (Via Parents Magazine) Your baby is about the size of a kumquat and can stretch his spine. Her eyes and eyelids are more developed and her eyebrows are beginning to grow. Baby's Length: 1.22 in. Baby's Weight: 0.14 ounce.

Baby is the size of a kumquat

Total weight gain/loss: None this week. I am currently holding at 157 pounds.

Maternity clothes?: Not yet.

Stretch marks? Nope

Sleep: Still getting up at midnight and 4:35 AM to go tot he bathroom.

Best moment of the week: My appetite has returned!!! This weekend was Superbowl party weekend. Birthday party on Saturday, then a Superbowl party on Sunday all with great food, family, friends, and fun!

Have you told family and friends: Most of them.

Miss Anything?: Not being breathless. I’m showing much quicker this time and even walking up the steps is making me a bit winded.

Movement: Nope

Anything make you queasy or sick: The smell of coffee and chicken still make me queasy. And some sweets are starting to bother me, which is odd because I love sweets. They make me feel seasick now.

Food cravings: This week I wanted sweet gerkin pickles, cheesteak subs, and salad.

Have you started to show yet: Yes. I thought it was just a bit of bloat, but by Saturday evening, several of the ladies from the party came over to privately asked if I was pregnant because I was a bit “pronounced” lol. I confirmed that I was and they were so excited for my husband and I lol. Trying to get bigger shirts to hide just a bit longer.

Gender prediction: #teamgreen

Labor Signs: No!

Belly Button in or out?: Still in

Wedding ring on or off?: On

Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody and irritable early this week, but much better toward the latter part.

Preparations for baby: None

Looking forward to: Warmer weather for walks outside. I think it will help with this endurance.

9 week update

DISCLAIMER: This post contains information about our pregnancy. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. I understand how much these posts can sting and promise to continue to add the disclaimer on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. I understand.


9 week Recap
Baby is the size of a cherry

Total weight gain/loss:  3 pounds gained.  I started this journey at 153 pounds, which is about seven pounds less than I was at my 9 month pregnant weight with our eldest ten years ago.  Sigh, lol.  I weighed in at our first obstetrics appointment Wednesday at 157 pounds. 

Maternity clothes?: Not yet, but I have had to use the hair tie trick for a couple of pair of pants and none of my business suits seems to want to fit quite right.

Stretch marks? Nope

Sleep: It varies.  Recently, I’ve started to wake a couple of times, once at midnight and once about 4:30a.m. to pee.  There have also been a couple of nights including last night where I am wide awake from 3-5:30 in the morning and I’ve only had about five hours of sleep!

Best moment of the week: Hmmm….my MIL made mustard greens, cake, baked apples, and tuna salad for dinner the other day so I wouldn’t have to when I came home.  It was so good and tasted so much like my home days in NC that I got teary eyed.  I love her. Oh and stopping meds!!!

Have you told family and friends:  Yep

Miss Anything? Not really, but I will admit to a bit of disappointment that I couldn’t have my appletini or Hurricane at the wedding we attended in January.

Movement: Nope

Anything make you queasy or sick:  YES!! The smell of coffee irritates me.  If I don’t eat something every two hours I’m also queasy. Chicken (especially the prep of raw chicken). UGH!

Food cravings:  I begged S. for a Nutty Buddy ice cream cone and Chinese food.  The Chinese food we got.  The Nutty Buddy he turned me down for because I'm anemic and "icecream isn't good for your blood" and since he was the one out, I acquiesced.  But trust, I'll get it soon lol.  The Chinese food craving comes every few days though.

Have you started to show yet:  Not really.  I have a bump, but I think it’s more from the residual Estrace and Endometrin.  A gf swore she could tell, but I don’t see it yet.

Gender prediction: So we’ve decided to be #teamgreen and not find out the baby until the delivery.  However, when I first found out, I thought it may be a boy.  We’ll see.

Labor Signs: No!

Belly Button in or out? Still in

Wedding ring on or off?  On, but I was so swollen (bloated) this morning it was hard to get them on and S. even recommended keeping them off.  Watching that carefully.

Happy or Moody most of the time: Oh my.  I wish I could say I was super happy all the time.  Most of the time, I’m good.  But I do get frustrated easier when I’m home in the evenings.

Preparations for baby: Not really.  I am in the process of changing insurance and the care offered to maternity and mothers will certainly be considered.


Looking forward to: the day S. can feel the baby move or hear the heartbeat from outside of my belly.

9 weeks, the first OB/Gyn Appointment, and work knows....

DISCLAIMER: This post contains information about our pregnancy. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. I understand how much these posts can sting and promise to continue to add the disclaimer on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. I understand.)


Hello everyone.  I apologize for the delay in sharing posts.  Truthfully, I've felt a bit odd in sharing news.  Not because I am not happy with pregnancy.  I truly am.  I just know how hard it is for so many in our community who have not yet had their BFP.  I want to be sensitive to that, but I also wants to answer and share for those who have asked for updates.  So, I'll continue to place the disclaimer and we will see how it goes from here.

According to most of my apps and the doctor's office, I am 9 weeks, 5 days today.  Baby is no longer an embryo, but a fetus.  Wow.  It's still amazing to me to know that I am progressing.  Every once in a while, I find myself feeling great and I wonder if something may be off only to get nauseous at the smell of coffee (okay, I get it little one.  We didn't drink it before and you want to make sure I don't drink it now), which is in my office daily.  Then, I'm reminded all is well.

Things have been going pretty well.  My morning sickness is pretty contained though it hit a new high last week that had me lying on the couch feeling like I was on a ship.  That was not fun.  I was making rice and beans for dinner and the smell of the beans had me wanting to hide under a table somewhere.  Today, I still have sickness when I rise and if I don't have something in my belly every two hours, I feel a bit yucky as well.

I had my first OB/Gyn appointment on Wednesday.  The doctor is the same one who delivered our eldest.  She usually has patients see the NP until they are further along, but when she saw my name coming in for an obstetrics visit, she made sure to be there with me.  There were a bunch of hugs and praise.  (She is a woman of faith, like I.)  It made me feel like home and I am pleased to be under her care again.  Her daughter is also expecting and her due date is also August 27th!  I told my obstetrician that I would probably be delivered by her assistant and she thinks that won't be necessary. She is convinced that she will be able to attend to both lol.  We shall see!


First Obstetrics Appointment
We discussed the IVF conception and the wonderful #TTCgroups that I have befriended via social media.  I also gave her information of the fertility pharmacy.  The pharmacy the clinic uses no longer prepares endometrin and it was a blessing that I walked in and was able to give her an affordable solution for her patients.  Yay!

So, let's talk about announcing.  Well, S. and I have been pretty liberal with our close friends and family knowing.  Most have been really great about not sharing.  Others not so much.  And that's okay. They are thrilled for us and you can't get mad at someone for celebrating with you.

But work?  Work has had no idea.  I hadn't planned on telling them until we were safely out of the trimester plus a few days.  March 1st was actually my planned announcement time.  The same for social media.  Well, that plan went awry Wednesday.  I felt ill.  Super ill and bloated.  I was walking slow, sluggish in general, and just not my peppy self that my colleagues are used to seeing.  Every smell hit me and the fatigue was incredible.by 11AM.  I hadn't had a day that hard in a while and I still needed to get through the day for my appointment and some work the office was doing.

Well, I decided to go to the break room to see if yogurt would help what I was going through.  By the time I got to the room, I was next to exhausted and actually had to put my head in my hands.  Our program manager came into the office and saw me and questioned if I was okay.  She is a very sweet lady, hard working, and doing wonderful things in her career.  She's also super concerned and can worry if she suspects her charges aren't doing well.  I saw the panic and heard her refer to perhaps needing nurse or getting checked because I looked decidedly ill.  I didn't want to lie and I told her I would be better soon, as soon as I eat something.  The conversation continued and I finally told her, "no, it really is okay.  I'm expecting.  I'll be fine."  She hugged me.  That was an awesome response.  She was super happy for me and I told her that I was still burning midnight oil and getting things done, but that day had just thrown me for a loop.  She understood and was super understanding.  She promised to keep it quiet until I was ready to share.  And she did.  However, there was someone who observed the exchanged from outside.  She is also a sweet woman, but a grandmotherly type...loves anything to do with babies :)

She asked me the next day if I was expecting in the presence of another grandmotherly type and there we go.  So, our immediate team knows that I am expecting and everyone is thrilled.  The external supporting teams don't know and I intend on keeping it that way for quite some time.

So, because things are actually happening.  I decided to play the update game.  I'll place on a separate post for those who are interested.  I'm not yet committed to the whole weekly thing.  We'll see though.  Hope you enjoy and have a great weekend.  I'll check in with you later soon!

-K

7 weeks preggo: The family announcement

DISCLAIMER: This post contains information about our pregnancy. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. Furthermore, I will continue to do so on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. It is not my intent to turn this blog into all things BFP, so I will make sure to try and keep things as open as possible while being sensitive to the stages that all of us are in per our respective journeys. With that in mind, today we are taking a break from the break to share the following….)
-----------------------------------------------------

It’s funny how things happen on a much grander scale than we originally plan. S. and I have always stated that we were just going to tell our parents about our pregnancy and then announce later at about 10 weeks. Well, Sunday afternoon we told S.’s parents and my mother, father and bonus mother, and honorary parents. Then, S. decided to tell his siblings which meant I had to tell my siblings and before you knew it, the siblings had shared to closest friends who shared with others and a lot of people knew.

It was a nice moment and everyone was happy for us. While most don’t know the intimate details of our struggle, they do know that S. and I have tried to conceive for 4 years and 7 months. When we adopted out beautiful daughter, I think people just assumed it was because we couldn’t conceive. We explained then that we had always planned to adopt children and would continue to expand our family through adoption or biologically, however God decided to bless us. Truthfully, with T's count, we didn't know if we could conceive.  Fast forward to today.

We didn’t exactly do a creative announcement though in hindsight, I would not have minded that at all. S. told his family that I’d been ill and in and out of doctor visits for a while (which is true). He said recently we’d discovered that my HCG counts were rising and was the culprit. His sister started shrieking as she knew immediately (She has four children, one who will be a year soon). She got it ASAP lol. The men were confused until S. continued and explained what that meant and I just smiled at their reactions.

When we told my family, they were a bit more subdued. It wasn’t because they weren’t happy. They are. They are just a more restrained bunch. I often tease them that I am a bit of an odd duck because I am the silliest, most light hearted, completely odd acting person I know.

My phone beeped with a couple of congratulatory messages and one call just so super excited for us. I’m thankful for the love and support and am praying for a healthy, happy, pregnancy.

I’ll probably hold off on updates for a while. (I say that and may change my mind later). I just like the idea of holding on until there is more to talk about. However, I should certainly say this morning sickness is definitely kicking my butt and is NOT restricted to mornings.

And I’m NOT complaining. As long as I am sick, I know things are well. So I’m all about the craving water and the dry heave of chicken (EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW….chicken).

That’s about it at the moment. I plan to check in again in a few days. We have a wedding coming up on Sunday and our 8-week scan (and RE graduation the next week). Looking forward to sharing.

-K

Why I haven’t updated my IG profile with our BFP

I spend quite a bit of free time on my social media pages, especially my #TTC Instagram profile. I like to scroll through the news feed and celebrate all of the good news and offer comfort and prayers where I can for the not so good news. I love seeing names change to reflect pregnancies and positive changes. I like seeing the bio portion of profiles with “#BFP” and positive signs. Some change them after positive betas, others change them after that line on the pregnancy test. Me? I haven’t changed anything yet. I actually think I might have confused a couple of new followers as my bio states I’m still going through IVF/ICSI right now. That’s kind of true. But I am out of the TWW wait and confirmation has been given that betas are rising. I could update to a BFP. But…I can’t, at least not right now.

I need to see him, her…them…our baby(ies). I need to know that there are heartbeats and that they are measuring okay. I need to know that everything is snuggled in and content and happy. I feel awful even typing it because I know that faith is not in sight. It’s the substance of things hoped for. It is the evidence of things not seen. I feel like Thomas doubting the wonderful news of Christ’s resurrection. I get it’s not quite that serious, but you can see the comparison. I feel like God has gifted us with this great blessing and I am not yet able to completely enjoy it.

Every time I wake up without a cramp or a wave of nausea, I worry. Then I pray. And God, in His grace, is usually kind enough to send assurance that I am still carrying a while later .(Thank you, Father.) Yesterday, we received our third beta and it rose significantly from beta #2, but it didn’t double and I was worried. Then the nurse told me that I shouldn't  worry because the increase is so significant and they don’t care about the doubling more than the increase. I still called my sister-friend though (who has been through IVF herself).

She reminded me that I need to treat this pregnancy as a first. It doesn’t matter that I had a pregnancy a decade ago. Everything here is new. This is my first assisted fertility pregnancy. There are new things that I don’t understand. Medicines I didn’t have to take during my first pregnancy I take this time. There are new tests, experiences, etc. She encouraged me to embrace this pregnancy as a first time experience with the added benefit of having experienced some of this before. Read my pregnancy books and blogs. Be cautious. It was great advice.

Today, I continue to move forward. S. and I called the RE office to schedule our first OB Ultrasound. We’re scheduled for Wednesday morning at 9AM. Our doctor will be out of the office next week, but the other doctor will be in. We’ll get to see what God has decided to do.

We have also decided that if all goes well, we will tell our parents after the ultrasound. I’m praying for good news. We appreciate them all very much!

I will write you all again soon.

-K





IVF #2: Beta #2- 4,258!

(This post will contain thoughts on this pregnancy and also the journey to get to this point. Because I know all too well how these kinds of posts may affect my fellow #ttcsisters and #ttcbrothers, I include this disclaimer to forewarn you. Furthermore, I will continue to do so on any post that may be related to this pregnancy (assuming viability) so that you may have the option to bow out of reading. It is not my intent to turn this blog into all things BFP, so I will make sure to try and keep things as open as possible while being sensitive to the stages that all our us are in per our respective journeys).
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello everyone. I apologize for disappearing on you. It wasn’t intentional. I got super busy with Christmas planning and haven’t had the luxury of blogging as I wanted. By now you know that on 23 Dec 2016, S. and I received news that we are pregnant. The phone call was amazing and just basking in that knowledge was such a wonderful and God-filled experience.

It wasn’t too much longer that I began to feel bits of confirmation the test was spot on with a huge wave of fatigue and some hints of nausea every once in a while. But, as shared in our post, S. and I are being cautious. We’ve decided not to share the news with our family and friends until we reach the second trimester or unless it becomes obvious, whichever comes first. We don’t want family to be super excited for us and then have to crush that excitement later. This is especially true for S.’s mom who, though much better, is still fighting cancer. So, we’ve enjoyed being pregnant together.

Yesterday was Beta #2. I woke up this morning and was worried that the immediate nausea that has greeted me the past two mornings wasn’t present. I also didn’t feel the heaviness in my breasts I felt last night. I was determined that I wasn’t going to stress too much. I went to the appointment anyway and have felt reminders that something is still going on all day. I was on pins and needles waiting for another beta and, after reading blogs of other fellow #ttc journeymen, I’m not sure I’ll ever stop worrying. Well, maybe after two or three scans. The call usually comes at 2PM. Yesterday,  it didn’t come until 4PM! I was just about to leave for the day when the phone rang.  It was nurse G. and she was spilling the news before I could stop her LOL!  I called S. and conferenced him in, only to be disconnected myself.  No bother, I still heard the results.

Our Beta #2 is 4258! Oh my goodness!!! So, we have another Beta on Thursday and hopefully will be moving toward ultrasound! I am so very excited and so very nervous.

 We’ve been trying for 4 years and 8 months. We may actually be pregnant!  There have been so many times I've squinted over lines that weren't there or cried over lines that were and decided to disappear.  I am so very, very excited.  I'm so very hopeful.  I want to tell everyone, but I then again I don't.  I have already started looking at Pinterest pins and pregnancy apps.  But I'm also cautious. Sometimes, I'll quickly delete a pin or app and say "we don't know what is going to happen".  That isn't fair.

I want to move forward as if our blessing has already arrived because it has.  I have asked God to be pregnant and health.  He's granted that.  That's a blessing.  He may choose to continue blessing S. and I in the future with the birth of a new healthy baby(ies).  If so, that will be another blessing.  I'm thankful just to be considered by Him.

Beta #3 is tomorrow and we'll see what happens.  I am praying for great numbers and a wonderful day.

I will talk with you all soon.

-K

IVF #2: Beta #1= BFP!

Oh my goodness!  Oh my goodness!!!  Hello everyone!  I am on pins and needles, but I have to share today's news with you.

This morning, I couldn't sleep.  I woke up at 3 A.M.  I tried to sleep, but couldn't.  I went down stairs and actually laid on the couch to watch a movie for an hour before finally returning to the bed.  I tossed and turned for a while and then I finally lay down for some sleep.  The alarm woke me not too much later and I hurried myself ready and was out the door.

I gave blood this morning and felt no symptoms.  I even told the nurse that I was hoping and praying for good news, but hadn't felt anything.  When I got home, I was tired.  I mean really tired.  I mean really, really tired.  I was barely able to keep my eyes open and my son asked if I wanted him to sit with his sister so I could rest.  That was very sweet of him.  I figured it was because I woke up so early.  I accepted his offer and took a three hour nap!!!!

Again, I just felt like I overdid it the past couple of days (running around prepping for 20+ people for Christmas Eve dinner).  About 1:35, I realized I missed a call from our nurse and tried calling her back.  It went to voicemail and I called again.  When she picked up, I told her not to say anything before I called S.  I called him and conference called him in.  There, our beautiful nurse A. was beaming ear to ear as she confirmed we ARE pregnant with a beta of 1,375!!!!!!  WE'RE PREGNANT!!!!!



Oh my goodness!  I'm so excited, as is S., though he has tried to downplay it a bit.  (The smile gives it away every time).  Nurse A. explained to S. (I already knew) that I will now have 3-4 more betas, with the hope that each will double.  She explained that at 6 weeks, we will have our first ultrasound to see if the heart is beating and to detect how many embryos implanted successfully.  (We reminded her that we transferred two).

I'm so happy, but also so nervous.  I had NO symptoms except cramping.  Now, I have a few..a bit of nausea here and fatigue there.  I don't know if the beta is going to increase.  I hope so.  I hope very much so.

S. and I have agreed not to share the news with any of our family or friends until after the first trimester is over or until we are sure we are at a point of viability.  That sounds so harsh and I hated the discussion, but I understood.  We don't want to bring the family up only to crush them if something should happen.

While they don't know the details of our journey, or our infertility, they do know that children are a desire of ours.

But I refuse to dwell in the low of it.  I am going to smile and enjoy every wave of nausea, every cramp, and every moment of fatigue.  These babies are on board and they are going to stay on board!!!

-K

IVF #2 9dp5dt: Cramps and spotting

Hi everyone.

So, I am trying NOT to get excited.  I am also very cautious in sharing this.  I have been cramping off and on for the past two days.  I shared a couple of Instagram posts about it.  They haven't been filling me with a warm and fuzzy.  Tonight, the cramps reached a fever pitch.  I was on the verge of tears because they really hurt!  I told S. that I didn't think this worked and went to the bathroom because it was time to take my Endometrin.  I went to the bathroom first and upon wiping discovered pink blood that only appeared when I wiped.  I immediately thought implantation bleeding as I remembered this vaguely from my son's pregnancy a decade ago.  I used the vaginal insert tool and when I withdrew it after inserting the tablet, there was a scant amount of pink there too.  I wiped again and nothing.  Then, I thought...too late for implantation bleed, right?  Anywho...

I flew down stairs and told S. that this may have just worked.  He wisely told me not to get to excited, but was smiling himself as I explained.  I still have cramps but it is accompanied by back aches.  The cramps now aren't horrible, but they are still there.

I still have NOT tested and I will keep my promise to S. not to.  I hope to not be disappointed on #beta day, but I can't do anything but pray and not stress now.  I won't be sharing this news on IG in a post.  I also won't share it with my two "real-life" #ttc cheerleaders as there will be no point if this isn't good news.

For now, I'm going to enjoy being pregnant unless proven otherwise.  And I am going to continue to joke with S. about baby names just in case.

Have a great night everyone.

-K

IVF #2  9dp5dt: Medications
  • Estradol- 2 pills taken orally (1 AM/1 PM)
  • Endometrin- 1 vaginal insert 3 times a day
IVF #2 9dp5dt:Symptoms
  • Recurring cramps
  • Intense Cramps
  • Slight nausea
  • Pink spotting
IVF #2 9dp5dt: Developments
  • None to report
Next Appointment
  • Beta test day- 23 Dec 2016

IVF #2 CD 12: T'was the night before retrieval

Hello everyone!

A lot has happened and, while I've been updating on IG, I haven't done the best of jobs updating on this cycle.   So, let me bring you all up to speed.  I posted on IG that my right side follicles were growing like champs, but my left was a bit more sluggish.  That didn't really concern me at first because it has always been a bit more sluggish.  But my right side started breaching 20 mm on Friday and by yesterday (Saturday CD 11), I actually had one trying to nudge 22.  The ultrasound technician actually spoke out loud that she wondered how much further "they would be willing to push it".  My nurse A. happened to be at the weekend monitoring location so after the ultrasound was complete, I went into a separate room with her to discuss trigger information.  I actually left skeptical because my left side still hadn't caught up.  There was one 19 mm on that side.  Everything else was 14-16.

Fast forward to yesterday evening while lounging with S. and the phone rings.  The nurse tells me that I was going to trigger that night at 8PM!  My retrieval has been scheduled for 8AM tomorrow and S. and I have to be there at 6AM.  Wow!  I was NOT expecting that.  I suppose I should have been though.

I am on the same protocol from cycle 1 and I triggered on CD 11 then.  So, I guess it really is history repeating itself.

Tonight, I have developed some sort of stomach bug.  I suspect it is from the burger I ate last night.  It came back immediately after I ate it (TMI).  Today, I was feeling a bit blah, but figured it was just my being tired.  I took a nap after church, had a bit to eat and my antibiotic for tomorrow, and then twenty minutes later I'm in the bathroom.

Ugh.  I am hoping it will run its course tonight.  I can't take anything after midnight and I am rapidly approaching midnight.

Here's praying tonight will calm my belly and that tomorrow will be okay.

Have a great evening.

-K


IVF #2 CD8: Daily Monitoring

Hello.  Today is CD 8, Stims Day 6.  I went for my blood work and ultrasound this morning and discovered that my follicles have been busy trying to grow.  My estrogen count is 1,443.  I have 12 measurable follicles.  My right side is continuing to overachieve with seven follies.  My left side is chugging right along with five.  At the moment, I'm looking like this...

Left Follicles                                                     Right Follicles
  1. 14.6                                                          1. 15.9
  2. 11.8                                                          2. 15.9
  3.   9.0                                                          3. 15.8
  4. 10.7                                                          4. 11.4
  5.   9.5                                                          5. 15.1 
  6. ----                                                            6. 11.4
  7. ----                                                            7. 11.1     
   The sonographer told me I would be in daily monitoring from now until transfer unless something changes.  I already made my appointments.  Things appear to be progressing along.  My back is starting to kick my butt and my level of fatigue is also rising.  I'm about to start inhaling the Gatorade again because these headaches have been returning and there is nothing fun about them.  There is also the nastiest nausea that I have ever felt.  Considering how there has been a stomach virus going around, I'm not too sure of what this is.

Stims Day 6     
  • Gonal-F 112.50 ius
  • Menopur 150.00 ius
Stims Day 6 Symptoms/Side Effects
  • Bloated
  • Fatigue
  • Headache
  • Backache
  • Hot Flashes
Stims Day 6 New Developments
  • Daily Appointments starting CD9 ( 1 Dec 16)
Next Appointment
  • Bloodwork and Ultrasound-IVF CD9
                           
I'll check in tomorrow.

-K

IVF #2 CD7: Tired!

Hi everyone!

Today was the introduction of Cetrotide.  So, I woke up this morning, tried to get everyone out and on time, and then realized I was about to walk out without my morning dosage.  So, I managed to pull everything out of the fridge, and without numbing myself with ice, took my needle.  Ugh.  It's a good thing I was in such a hurry this morning.  I didn't have time to focus on the HURT!!!  UGH!

It wasn't until I was halfway home this PM when I realized that tonight I'll be taking three shots before I lay head to pillow....and I'm already exhausted.

Tonight, I'll be taking Gonal-F and Menopur (double dose).  So how do I feel?

Well, honestly, I'm sleepy.  I am so tired, so fatigued.  I feel exhausted and I would like nothing more than to take a nap.  I remember taking my last shots at 7:30 because it worked well with our schedule. Because my schedule altered this cycle, I'm taking the meds at 9:15.  I wish I could take them earlier now.  I really want a nap.

Other than that, I'm great.  Not much cramping today, so I'm not even sure everything is working today.  But I assume so.

Let's pull today's stats and see what tomorrow's bloodwork and ultrasound bring us.

I'll talk to you later.

-K

Stims Day 5
  • Gonal-F  112.50 ius
  • Menopur 150.00 ius
Stims Day 5 Symptoms/Side Effects
  • Bloated
  • TIRED
Stims Day 5 New Developments
  •   Cetrotide to be added 29 Nov AM
Next Appointment
  • Bloodwork and Ultrasound-IVF CD8, Stims Day 6

The wait...

So, I took a test two days ago. I swore I saw a shadow, the shadow of a second line. I didn’t want to get excited because it was so faint. So faint I wasn’t sure it was even there. But my son saw it too, not even realizing what he was looking at. So, I took another yesterday. This time, it was a bit more shadow, but I could see it. It was there. I swore it was there. But, again, it was very, very faint. So I made an appointment with my ob/gyn to have blood drawn. The earliest time they could see me was 1000. I was there at 0930 because I was so nervous. Then, they told me I wouldn’t know until Monday at least since they don’t work on the weekends. Oh joy.

So, I drove back to my office, not feeling anything except crampy. I hoped that maybe it was implantation bleeding. With my son, on the day my cycle was due, I had what can only be described as an “explosion” pattern in my underwear and then nothing. I wiped and nothing. So, as I am at work, I go to the bathroom and observe creamy CM tinged with about three specks of brown blood. I wipe thinking I would see the beginning of my cycle like always. No. Nothing. Frustrated, I take another test, one of two remaining. BF N. I thought I saw a shadow, but….it could have been wishful thinking. I honestly don’t know.

All I know right now is I feel bloated, a bit crampy, and so confused…oh…and tired….I want a nap. All PMS symptoms, all possible pregnancy symptoms. And I won’t know which is which until Monday at least. Uggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh.

I haven’t even told S. what’s going on. There is no need to tell him, get him excited, and then have him not excited. So, I’ll wait until Monday. Fortunately, there are a number of activities this weekend to keep my mind occupied. Let’s see how this goes.

Praying for positive.

-K

Is this the app for that? And waiting...again...


So, I’m not currently on a medicated cycle. I don’t know when I’ll have the ability to once again be on an Reproductive assisted cycle. We simply cannot afford it right now. So, for the moment, all I can do is try naturally. So far, nothing doing.

I was turned on to an app called Optia by the ladies in the Instagram #TTC community. I’d been using the Glow app and, while it captured good information, I’d not seen results in the year that I’d been working with it. The Optia app offered more of a medical insight on everything I’m going through in my body. It also gave me a fertility phase and chance of fertility scale that was more user-friendly (in my opinion) than Glow. So, I’ve been trying it while simultaneously monitoring my stats on the Glow app.

This past week, I was at an extremely fertile. I should have known it because I felt like She-ra, Princess of Power for a while there. I think I scared S. I was so…um…anxious to see him. I looked at the app and realized I was at a 27 on the fertility scale! First of all, I’ve NEVER seen a number that high. But considering how I felt like I could bench press a bus, it matched. So, we baby danced several times, several nights. As is true with my body, I felt She-ra leave and regular me return. Now, according to both apps, I have to wait two weeks before testing. So, here I am.

I really want this to work. I really want to be pregnant. I really want to carry S.’s child. I want to see his face break into a huge grin as he realizes that he is going to be a daddy…again, but for the first time as well. But, once again, I’m not sure it will happen L.

I’ve had cramps off and on all day. At first I thought it could possibly be implantation, but nope. No spotting. I’m doing the same stupid things I do every month, but promise myself I won’t do like going to Babycenter’s due date calendar and calculating due dates and milestones. I’m contemplating when I can #poas and get an accurate response. I’m looking at maternity clothes. I’m a mess. And I do it monthly. UGH!

Today, right now even as I draft this post, my secondary screen is open to forums on Pre-seed and Secondary infertility. The cramps are coming with disappointing regularity and I am ready for another failure. I keep trying to think positive, but it will be four years at the end of this month.

I need something to work. Sigh…

Here’s waiting two weeks….Good luck to us.



-K