Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts

The medication discussion

Today I had my appointment with the doctor who prescribed my anti-anxiety and anti-depressant medications.  I've been nervous about this appointment because I wanted to know the risks and benefits associated with my continuing medication while expecting.

Things have definitely been easier and more emotionally stable for me being on the medication.  I feel like a better mother, wife, and woman than I have felt in a long time.  That being said, as the pregnancy progresses I've felt the familiar anxiety I felt before when my hormones were out of whack.  I know that recently when I take a bit more of my medication, I feel much better so I wanted to discuss maybe upping the dosage as a standard, but ONLY if it won't harm the baby.

Depression is Real

Many years ago, I wrote a poem while in high school. I was going through depression then, but no one knew it. I smiled every day. I was polite and poised. I made sure to represent my family’s name well. I made sure to maintain high grades and speak positive. I encouraged others and made sure no one left my presence without feeling like I truly cared about their well being. Inside I was dying. I walked out of one room with a smile and turned the corner by myself with a frown. I compared myself to other incessantly. Why wasn’t I popular? Why didn’t people like me? Why did I get teased so much? Why wasn’t my mother raising me? Why wasn’t my father raising me? I was hurt. When I wrote the poem, it was to explain to myself what I was feeling and the impact it was having on me.

Yesterday I was saddened to read the news of Kate Spade, who chose to commit suicide to escape her personal struggles. I can only imagine the heartbreak she felt in believing the world and her family would be better off without her presence. I can only imagine how hard her husband, daughter, and loved ones are searching to see if there were signs. Of course, now there are rumors of splits and mental illness. That now is not the point. With her gone, all that remains is the prevention of another such tragedy before it’s too late.

I abhor bullying!

I abhor bullying. I really do. I can’t stand it. It’s getting so prevalent. Kids can’t go home to escape it because they see it on their social media at home. Don’t have access to social media at home? Their friends tell them and show them on their electronic devices. Then, because the kids don’t want to seem like weaklings they don’t say anything to anyone who can do something about it. And then something tragic happens.

That’s what happened in our county. A sixth grader, the same grade as my Superbug, was allegedly being bullied by an 8th grader. It had been going on for a while. I don’t know all of the details, but I do know that based on the information slowly trickling out, the little boy went into his parents’ bedroom, retrieved a weapon kept there, and committed suicide. I am absolutely floored. FLOORED.

I can’t imagine what the parents are going through. I can’t imagine coming into a room and finding the lifeless body of your child. I can’t imagine not being able to assist him, not knowing there was even an issue. The internal questions of how they missed, did they do enough…I can’t imagine.

Then, the parents of the bully. What do you say? What do you do? What is the impact of knowing the reason a child is dead is because your child thought it fun to bully someone else. What do you do?

Please pray for the family of the little boy and pray for children everywhere. They need to know that bullying is never okay and that they are never alone. I HATE A BULLY.